Candor Creek

When I was a kid I used to daydream about what dogs I'd get and what I would name them instead of weddings and such. Storm's naming was an interesting process: a series of happy accidents and coincidences (his rescue story + my lifelong desire to name a dog after a weather-based event + the perfect song for a show name) sort of designed the whole package for me. I went to meet him with a few call names in mind and new exactly what I was going with within five minutes of seeing him. The song I linked has been one of my very favorites since childhood. I do not have the words right now to describe what it does to my brain or my chest when it comes on. I think I might name my next Beardie after it. It's a very Beardie tune, actually. I've got a great call name for a male, but I'm still struggling to find a female call name I like. The obvious is Luna but, my God, I've known so many Lunas. There's the whole MLP thing, too, and just... I dunno. Doesn...

The chocolate I'd be eating... if I wasn't in a flare. :( I have the clarity right now, so I'm talking about a difficult topic. It's one of those mini-essays I write that sometimes stops me from getting sicker, and I need all the help I can get right now. The PMS/PMDD is right on time, which is actually a giant, relieving sign that I may be headed out of this flare soon. The second half of a cycle is always more reactive for many women, both for allergies and MCAS. Being a very rare two weeks late in Jan/Feb (!!!) due to the stress of losing my dog made me super reactive and directly resulted in my current MCAS flare and prolonged recovery. ...but it also means that the Monster is back, and I hate, fight, and fear her. I'm now laying here, still recovering, with this constant psychic pain, this rage. It's physical.  It's in my chest and arms and shoulders. I actually twitch. The emotion always comes first, and it quickly wraps itself around any nea...