Forget Me Not

My goal today was to make him smile.

Storm, as old men tend to do, has been having a bout of just not feeling good lately. I am certain that it's a pain management issue; his behavior matches that of what he exhibited just before going on his latest pain/nerve medication. He has a fairly extensive vet appointment on Wednesday (checkup, bloodwork plus thyroid panel, dental cleaning, benign gum tumor removals) that will most likely result in an incease in these meds, and it can't come too soon as far as I'm concerned. I hate seeing him in pain. He's never been a healthy boy anyway, but as he's gotten older his rough patches tend to leave him in a heap on our floor, life force drained, with this terrible look on his face. That expression will absolutely always carve holes in my chest. It actually haunts me at night.

...so maybe that's why somewhere in my current mania I decided that I needed to drop everything and give Storm a Really Good Day. Between both of our poor health states it's super hard to get out and explore anymore. Actually, we recently celebrated 12 years together and I had planned to take him to a dog beach - the Great Lakes version of the West Coast beach days we used to have - but a few days beforehand a couple of Epipens benched me and then Storm's current issues started immediately after that. We instead spent the day at home in our respective healing places - togther, which was the important part of the event.

Figuring out how and when to take a painful old man out on an excursion is tricky, but it all aligned today and we made it out. It was a bit of a risk on my part- I'm still highly reactive - but the absolutely gorgeous rainy day kept the sun away and the mold spores down (albiet not enough to forgo the mask I need to wear. I wasn't going to do something doubly risky when I was already pushing it). We honestly didn't do much - just drove around in the rain for a bit and went to an empty park - but it seems to have been just the right amount of activity for the two of us. He payed a little mind to the Canadian geese, which I was more than OK with. He found an abandoned sweatshirt and peed on a couple trees. I set him up for a long recall and he came trotting right to me, much slower than he used to but no less enthusiastically. His show finish was lost somewhere in his dementia. I didn't bother him with a full correction. He came home to a dry towel, a turkey neck treat, and his afternoon pain meds. He's relaxing in his crate and alternating between snoozing and laughing at me. He might be a bit stiff when he wakes up from the impending nap but I don't think he overdid it. I let him tell me when he was done and he did so wonderfully.

I'm always aware that I don't have many days like this left with him, and that truth leaves me a bit somber after every little romp. Thankfully I seem to be holding onto the joy today, which makes it that much sweeter.

I think it's time for my nap, too.